Gaijin Explorer Inc is experiencing some considerable cuts and the frequency of posts will surely drop considerably. Sell your stocks, stock your pantry, and hold your weapon or bible close because the apocalypse really is coming. DOOOO IT NOWWWWW! (Enter Arnold Shwarzeneger’s voice)
I realize I probably just spelled that name wrong, and don’t even have enough motivation to spell check it which would take literally 5 seconds. Proof that this blog right now isn’t quite in sync with the mind/body/spirit stuff everyone’s talking about lately. Recent revelations are leading me to the center, and fretting over thinking about posting on this blog, and not being able to post a single damn thing about the million ideas about zen/aikido/Japan I have everyday is just too much something when I’m looking for nothing.
This weekend I went to an Opeth concert. If you don’t know them and are curious to what they sound like and have the slightest effort to find out, look them up on youtube. If you actually go to the effort, you could look up the song “Bleak” to find my favorite tune. Live would probably be good.
So, anyway, I went to this concert and realized I need to be doing what I want to do. But I’ve realized that ten thousand times before, and where that has taken me is to some ultra-sped up world where I have created far-off goals that I am trying to realize in the moment … but they’re more like the kind that take more than a moment to realize. For only a couple examples, becoming a great writer, a master of martial arts, and more fluent in Japanese than Japanese. I assure you there’s many more, but these three seem to be the biggest. Anyway, so I had this revelation, thought about my past conclusions, and remembered a wonderful theme of a recent show I’ve been watching, “Spartacus”, which is …
“Kill them all.”
(If you know about Opeth and Spartacus, and remember I made a post a while back about how the media we watch affects our life and vice versa, you’re probably making some connections.)
This doesn’t have to be so violent or extreme. It’s merely a fact of life and tenet of zen: In order for something new to grow, or to even see reality, we ought to get rid of excess … what we don’t need. Well, what we don’t need may be a lot, especially for all of those living in first world countries. After I publish this post, my postings will become severely more infrequent than they already are, and then I will throw away a lot of things I don’t need from my apartment … then tomorrow I’m not going to take a bunch of stuff I don’t need to work like I always do, and try not to drink more coffee than I need. We all have dispositions; mine is a tendency to excess and fascination with zen … which makes for a very strange and often frustrating condition.
Anyway, I’m rambling on, and won’t take the time to edit this, so I just want to say that I probably won’t be posting often here for a while, but will keep reading the quality blogs I’ve become so attached to, keep reading about zen, experiencing Japanese culture, and thinking about aikido every step I take.
What is most extraordinary about myself existed before the time I started thinking and hoarding in fear. I don’t wish a return, but a rebirth without the bullshite. While that self is in the womb, samurai zac will be dropping the sword a bit on unwelcome guests.
Will Odysseus come home? Or forever be lost at sea?
We must slay the ghosts of our past in order to be born into the next world.